Hey,
Woody!
I’ve
been
dating
this
awesome
guy
I
met
on
Manhunt
for
a
few
months.
I’m
all
about
being
honest
in
a
relationship,
but
I’m
scared
to
tell
him
that
I’m
falling
for
him
because
I
think
it
may
push
him
away.
How
soon
is
too
soon
to
say,
“I
love
you?”
It’s
like
I
fight
the
urge
to
say
it
every
time
we
share
a
nice
moment
or
sleep
together;
but
I
worry
that
if
I
do,
he
may
end
the
relationship.
Any
advice?
Dear
Secret:
Nothing
will
kill
a
love
affair
faster
than
saying
“I
love
you”
too
soon.
And
believe
me,
it’s
too
soon.
You
wouldn’t
have
written
if
it
weren’t.
Your
relationship
isn’t
going
to
collapse
if
you
stop
yourself
from
saying
it,
but
it
might
if
you
do,
so
why
take
the
chance?
Besides,
he
already
knows!
Don’t
you
know
when
somebody’s
in
love
with
you?
So
why
risk
the
possibility
that
he’d
back
off,
create
distance
and
maybe
date
other
guys?
Bottom
line:
Never
say
something
the
other
guy
isn’t
prepared
to
hear.
A
temporary
delay
in
expressing
yourself
isn’t
dishonesty.
It’s
intelligence.
Hey
Woody!
I’m
new
to
the
whole
gay
scene.
I
go
to
the
gym
regularly
and
wonder,
is
there
any
way
to
tell
if
a
guy
is
gay?
A
buddy
of
mine
said
that
gay
guys
shave
their
pubic
hair
—
that
it’s
a
sign
of
their
pride.
I
don’t
believe
this
because
some
of
my
straight
buddies
shave
as
well.
Is
there
a
visible
sign
that
somebody’s
gay?
Dear
Looking:
I’M
ANSWERING
YOU
IN
ALL
CAPS
BECAUSE
I
DOUBT
YOU’LL
BE
ABLE
TO
HEAR
ME
ALL
THE
WAY
BACK
IN
THE
1950s.
Do
you
honestly
believe
that
there
are
“signs”
of
homosexuality?
Yes,
some
guys
flame
out
so
much
you
gotta
hide
the
lighter
fluid,
but
for
the
most
part
the
only
way
to
tell
if
a
guy
is
gay
is
when
he
lands
in
your
bed.
And
even
then
……
Hey
Woody!
I’m
gay
but
not
out
to
anyone.
The
problem
is,
I’m
love
with
my
best
mate,
who
is
straight,
though
I
have
a
feeling
he
could
be
gay.
I’m
afraid
things
would
never
be
the
same
if
I
told
him
my
feelings
and
asked
him
if
he
is
gay.
I
love
what
we’ve
got
as
friends
and
wouldn’t
change
it
for
the
world,
but
what
am
I
supposed
to
do
with
these
feelings
I
have
for
him?
Dear
Gayzed:
You
have
better
odds
of
getting
hit
by
lightning
and
successfully
suing
God
than
being
boyfriends
with
your
BFF.
Doesn’t
mean
you
shouldn’t
try,
though.
Tell
him
a
cousin
came
out
to
you.
If
he
reacts
badly
(“Cut
him
off
from
the
family”)
go
no
further.
If
he
reacts
well
(“Nothing
wrong
with
it,”
or
better
yet,
“Is
he
hot?”)
then
wait
a
few
weeks
and
come
out
to
him.
Under
no
circumstances
should
you
ask
him
if
he’s
gay
or
that
you
want
to
play
Hide
the
Hotdog
with
him.
If
he’s
straight,
he’ll
assume
you’re
attracted
to
him
anyway
(don’t
they
all?)
and
if
he’s
a
’mo,
you’ll
just
scare
him
deeper
into
the
closet.
Just
breathe.
If
he’s
gay,
something
will
happen
naturally.
