What
is
it
with
bisexual
lady
pop
stars?
Dish
feels
that
she
can’t
shake
a
coke
spoon
around
a
high-end
nightclub
without
hitting
some
girl
singer
who
swings
both
ways.
The
latest
wailer
to
jump
on
the
“If
it
moves,
I’ll
French
kiss
it
for
a
profit”
bandwagon
is
New
York
club
diva
Lady
Gaga.
The
voice
(though
probably
not
the
writer)
behind
the
summer
hit
“Just
Dance”
recently
told
HX
Magazine
that
chromosomes
don’t
matter
as
long
as
she’s
getting
her
high
notes
hit.
“I
love
men,
I
love
women
and
I
love
sex,”
she
said.
Dish
is
refreshed
to
find
someone
who
will
actually
own
it.
While
Britney
Spears’
Madonna
kiss
and
formerly
shaved
head
may
have
talked
the
lesbian
talk,
it
is
unlikely
that
she
has
been
with
anyone
more
feminine
than
K-Fed,
though
K-Fed
does
appear
to
have
very
soft
skin.
However,
Lady
Gags
also
says
that
her
physical
pursuits
often
take
backseat
to
her
creative
ones.
“…
I’m
actually
pretty
introverted
right
now
because
I’m
so
enveloped
in
my
work
...
A
lot
of
times,
boyfriends
and
girlfriend
get
jealous
and
want
all
your
attention,
and
I
don’t
really
have
time
for
that.”
What?
Gay
and
straight
people
alike
fantasize
about
the
life
of
the
bisexual.
We
like
to
imagine
them
unencumbered
by
pickiness,
running
through
a
lush
forest
of
mix-and-matched
genitalia,
plucking
as
they
see
fit.
Way
to
ruin
the
dream,
Gaga.
Way
to
ruin
the
dream.
Some
weeks,
Dish
has
very
little
to
talk
about.
All
the
celebrities
go
on
vacation,
or
some
kind
of
synchronized
rehab,
and
she
is
forced
to
sit
around
twiddling
her
thumbs
and
tweezing
her
generous
bikini
line.
Though
this
can
take
hours,
Dish
is
still
excited
when
an
item
rolls
across
her
desk
that
is
veritably
laden
with
gay
intrigue.
Like
recent
reports
from
Spiderman
tingler
James
Franco
about
his
role
in
an
upcoming
biopic
about
Harvey
Milk.
The
title
character
in
the
film,
called
“Milk,”
is
to
be
played
by
Sean
Penn.
And
Franco
gets
the
potentially
ignominious
task
of
playing
Milk’s
milker.
Franco
appeared
on
Jimmy
Kimmel
live,
reporting
that
Penn
actually
requested
that
more
love
scenes
be
added
to
the
script
and
that
the
pair
spent
quite
some
time
makin’
out
on
camera.
Even
more
salaciously,
Franco
donned
a
“Boogie
Nights”
style
penile
prosthetic
for
a
number
of
nude
pool
scenes,
leading
Penn
to
believe
that
Green
Goblin
was
much
bigger
than
it
actually
was.
Though
no
sources
will
say
what
Franco
actually
is
packing,
Dish
guesses
that
it’s
six
inches
of
one,
half
dozen
inches
of
the
other.
Australian
singer
Sia,
best
known
for
her
“Six
Feet
Under”
closing
anthem
“Breathe
Me,”
spent
some
time
this
year
barely
denying
her
relationship
with
former
Le
Tiger
member
JD
Samson.
The
mustachioed
musician
went
a
little
more
hardline,
refusing
to
even
discuss
the
situation,
but
actions
spoke
louder
than
words.
The
pair
was
spotted
making
out
after
Samson’s
Black
Cat
show
in
March.
Now
Gawker
reports
that
they
were
spotted
canoodling
again
on
Aug.
8,
this
time
across
from
the
Whole
Foods
in
Manhattan’s
Union
Square.
While
Sia
has
been
open
from
day
one
about
liking
girls
and
guys,
Dish
takes
the
above
information
to
be
incontrovertible
proof
that
the
singer
is
a
lesbian.
While
making
out
with
a
girl
first
raised
her
suspicions,
this
documented
proximity
to
a
Whole
Foods
just
seals
them.
Who
shops
at
those
places
anyway?
They’re
gayer
than
three-dollar
bills
wrapped
around
tangerines
in
a
U-Haul
headed
for
a
Home
Depot.
If
Fred
Phelps
were
any
smarter,
he’d
boycott
them.
Dish
does
want
to
wish
the
couple
the
best
of
luck.
Happy
gay
couples
are
so
rare
in
today’s
media,
and
even
more
so
when
they
are
modern
day
arbiters
of
cool.
